kysc
I think it's about time for me to get my butt moving after 8 months of lazing around. Since the first time I decided to study for exams, since the first time I remember myself entering the dance studio in a chilling, damp night, carrying books and notes not knowing where to start revision for econs, begins my starvation from bboy.
And up to yesterday's chilling, dry night did I make a point to resume what and where I left off. So hopelessly behind, but glad that I made the decision nonetheless. No use saying that one won't give up bboying but in fact he had. Just say it in the face. I give up.
My decision in the opposite. No matter what command school will fling at me, I will pluck time up to pursue this passion.
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Guys, it matters to me whether you guys bboy or not in the future. But I will never account bboying to our bonding, just like many of you would not I am sure. Some of you guys would have given up silently. Please don't pledge to each other. These facts are only true to yourself. So if you quit, it's still alright :) We will stick together for a lifetime :))
But I am making a decision to continue, at least for the phase of NS when it's hardest to do so (NS, give me the shit man). So I hope you guys will follow.
Labels: awakening, bboy, friends n loved ones, future, God, kyensai, resolutions, sincerely
Thanksgiving post
i've just finished 2 and a quarter GLASSES of tequila, and went breaking after that. so im kinda like tipsy now. And for such, i will type my thanksgiving post. I brand myself for being honest and completely sincere to my friends with anything I say, so with all my heart and all my sincerity, this is for you :) Also, because im tipsy, my neural processes aren't as controlled as they should be, this is because your subconscious processes slow and become less controlled.. not totally uncontrolled that's the thing, but i want it to be less activated so what i say would be equally sincere, but more honest and true. I'm known for my super-intrapersonal knowledgle and rationality even when I'm completely drunk, but heck it, this night at 1.24am, i will just let it loose abit, that's if i can.
Well, where should I start? ok kyensai first, you other guys will flow into my mind later :)
Daniel and Christina - Hey you both, it's been a few years and i've blogged roughly the same stuff. You guys may be bored of it, but well, it's sincere and from my heart, not any of this is the sort of copy-paste shit you see in mass-produced thanksgiving cards. The fact that acknowledge you 2 together is because i see you 2 as one, i mean, when i confide in any 1 of u, i will do so equally for the other party. Thanks for offering a rational voice and supporting me in my actions and stuff. Hanging around with me in school, being good company and talking about so many things in the world man. A piece of information: what makes a couple stronger is not how strong their personality start with, it's how much they've been though and called it their past and future.
Xinfu - You, my son, are an awesome creature. I really wish for more of you people to be around the world when needed man, people who would really advice me, would really bereate me, and who would really offer his honest and brutally honestest honest opinion to me. I haven't beeen very very close to you yet, but your rationality in reasoning and the fact that you're unafraid to hurt people's feelings and the very fact you're completely honest about what you feel and what u tell us when you mean it earns my ton of respect. I would rather someone walk the walk, talk the talk, and mean every word he say instead of live up to a certain expectation.
Edmund - Just about one of the closest persons i've been close with this year. Thanks for lending a listening ear, after all, you're not a person who's quick to advice and talk, but you're one who is able to listen and empathize. You're just about the person who know what's going on in my life, and thanks for being in such a position because recently you heard alot of shit lol. But well, also, friends forever, brathars forever. You know, that's one thing about brothers, they don't leave each other. Bros before holes (random comment lol honest). But for so long we've known each other, perhaps you are the friend which knows so much about me, and thanks for tolerating with that. Oh thanks for your straight-up honest comments sometimes. I really need them cos sometimes i don't really know what i'm doing. But returning a favour for a favour, i will return the same you gave to me, thanks brother.
Jyong - Hey jyong, instead of thanking you for this and that, I would like to apologize for my inadequacy as a friend in the past few months I've known you. Yes, i'm tipsy, but im completely brutally honest. But still, thanks for teaching me mills and backflips. Let us be real brothers and friends. I don't call everyone brother.
JT - Thanks for trying to understand my psyche lol, you guys are those who i seldom confide in, but when pressed i would. remember when the time i told you about being like weird and stuff? Thanks so much for it. I have excellent memory and remmeber random things and things which are small and rather insignificant to people. Though I know you are the few who can really listen, i get to realize it first hand that night when we talked to 3+am. Thanks for listening to me :)
Kyensai - you guys have been my closest in these few years. Though i seldom or never in these few years had a best friend, you kyensians serve to be my closest fellowship i've ever had. No words can thank you enough, although i told and confided and talked to you guys little, you guys are the brothers i really love.
Parabola - as if you visit this blog, i will email you this thing. Alright for oryx and crake, I'll return you the book soon later :) And alrite, thanks for the random encounters on the corridors of the sch having conversations about anything in the world man! also like the phrase "are you thinkiing what i'm thinking?" which made the trademark of the years HAHA. (that, which actually means squash). But really, you intelligent boy who offers a differing view to the situations.
J.Wong - for all the sports and all the brotherhood you brought to us, the toast for the future ahead. The tennis, the badminton, gym, soccer, you are like a sports friend man! Well thanks for trusting me and letting me listen to some of the stuff you would tell me and you said to trust me to keep it :)
Bobbie - yupps, for the shopping sprees and hang-outs, it was fun (including saving alot alot of money HAHA), and yes, thanks for it of cos. OH thanks for the diarrhoea incident too.
PeiWen - Hey well haven't talked in some time, but yea, thanks for the diarrhoea incident LOL.
TianYong - We hadn't talked much this year, but thanks for expressing concern for me. Well we remain good friends don't we. Had got to know about complexities, had gotten to explore our mirroring thoughts and ideas. And too, the growing phase of obsession with intelligence. Well im sure both us had grown and developed alot over the past few months, but be assured, that when a friend is needed I will be there to listen and I mean it. And same on the other side. Deal?
Teachers - you guys were the largest part of my education journey. The determination and dedication you mentors displayed cannot be put to words. Passion indescribable, efforts insurmountable. Chinese A2 teachers, you have inspired me and spurred me on beyond much i could expect of myself. You guys made be believe in myself and the fact that it's possible. The efforts and dedication you guys pump into work is amazing. Special dedication to them, they deserve so much. But I would also have to mention other teachers, who had played such important part in my learning journey, driving me along the way, challenging me to greatest heights.
WeiYang - You have been such an inspiration during my learning process in Chinese. You never stopped spurring me on and inspiring me and encouraging me. I started diffident, unconfident, and ended up accomplished, contented and well-challenged. Thanks for inspiring me and encouraging me, because i really understand what it means by your encouragement. You too, are an inspiration and an encouragement. So much progress, development, maturity overseen through the past year, so much path trodden, and I assure you, there will be friends that will last always.
Seth Chua - Yes, you're still a friend, a important friend of my dear. Thanks for entrusting me with such secret information which i am nt really very supposed to know. But whatever it is, i know you are there willing to be a friend which will listen and stuff. Weirdly, that's what i felt you were. All the best fo the year ahead!
Parents and family - hey dad, mom, brother, grandma had given me limitless support that i feel like i'm free to do anything. But that's aside the point. It means alot from one's parents to affirm their sons, and for my brother to trust me enough to talk to me. I mean, i really feel that I have somewhere to return to, I feel that i am rooted, and i really know that i have somewhere to go, and a responsibility to bear. Although I may call it a chore, the support and love you all give me, i truly appreciate. I shall stop calling myself a good son no more. Just because i return the favour with good grades don't amount to the efforts you guys put in for me. I truly appreciate that.
Victoria - hey nice knowing you Vic. I really never had any female friend who I am so talkable and sociable with in my life before. Nice the PTNH, then the hanging out at fairprice, then the random astroturf-dancestudio picnics and all sorts of random stuff. Thanks so much for being there. Also helping out in the studies lol. Espcially with math when im like stuck then u come out with some solution and i start banging my head asking myself why am i so dumb. Please pardon my pride and esteem :( Thanks for listening to my saikang, all the entity, all the simple complexities and all the 1000 thought processes in the head must be quite alien to understand right? Aiya simple one la, im a simple dude man :) But really nice getting to know you. Really hope to get to know you better and keep in contact through NS. Sorry for the first impression thing, but it is hard to erase. Now it's fine, and i see you as such a nice person. I truly treasure this friendship.
And so these are the people who had moulded my past year. Without whom, i would not have became the YH of today. The development I went through is crazy, much to the people here. Thanks for being such great friends and such great support. Excellent voices of advice, indispensible companions, unforgettable brethrens, and the much-needed companionship. Albeit having many friends, you guys are really the ones who are important to me, who were so instrumental in shaping and moulding me the past year. Not enough thanks can be accredited to you guys, for you all are just awesome and inspiring. I had so much fun, renewal and rejuvenation with every one of you.
Every single one of you are just awesome.
Labels: friends n loved ones, heart, life, sincerely
"Thanksgiving"
I was about to blog nothing when i realized that thanksgiving is square the corner.
AND I HAVE already past it.
So much stuff happened this year, as they call 7 the perfect number, this is to be the "perfect" year.
However, this isn't obvious that it's perfect. Nothing much went it's best this year, nothing went too well, so many flops and mistakes i make, had many unpleasant experiences, fell into so many traps the devil devised.
But this year is the first year in so many, in fact all my life which i had learned so much from. Thank God for all this. I've never experienced so much, and learned so much in a year before. As i look back, i may be able to see why is it a "perfect year"?
btw, this is NOT ACCORDING TO MERIT OR WATEVA K.
Kyensai - 2 new crew members. Jonathan Tan and Jonathan Yong. I really thank God for you 2 for the commitment you guys have shown. At your level 1.5 years ago, i was SO slack, not enthusiastic, showing little interest for improvement. However God just made a way somehow. And now my weakness is to leave Him out of the picture, the One who made my bboying to a stage of self-sustinence. I loved the time during teachers' day. U know i so felt like the same way as i did when we first formed? the unity, and four of us, Song, Edmund, Xinfu, Yuanhao (GUYS DO YOU REALIZES IT ABREVIATES TO SEXY???!?!?!?! HAHAHAHA). I also love the NJ concert and the RPsenting, i feel our unity as a unit. together, as one crew, as what we always wanted when we started. I feel so proud for you guys as bboys, and more imptly as friends. We still abide by the 'rules' we set for ourselves to never accept bboys based on skill, but only on friendship and love. I feel so proud for we worshipped God, and we all can just talk about anything, no backstabbing, but dead honest, truthful comments. I thank God for you guys, and i still can't believe i was in the right time, right place to be with you guys today.
Song - my teamate for RPsenting, thank God for someone who held up the team and showed some awesome style man! You our leader, we will be a crew that center God still. I pray.
Edmund - Thank God for you being a councillor! for doing stuff to change my school. all the best, may you serve till your term ends.
Xinfu - this year dno what happen to you. All the funiness explode out. you on drugs or sth! but you are still insightful, and deep, the xinfu i know. psst in exception of some flops hehe.
YuanHao - for filling up the "Y".
Jonathan Tan - one year our senior, in sessions n most of the time, i totally forgot your seniority! But it's when we talk about life maters, you are here to advice, to give your opinion, and there simply to listen and understand. On the surface u're so funny, and you may look like a joker. But you're not man, bearing resemblance to xinfu, your maturity is fledged.
Jonathan Yong - you frikin luff like a WITCH la. i heard you have 40 something hand hops. hey keep training man! all the best for the future man :) Thank God for being another part of Kyensai SEKSAY.
Glenn - for being so honest. Giving advice for our crew and stuff. Helping us improve in many ways. and your apologetic ways are DAM funny. but anyway, you really improved man. but pls dun be!
The guys in class (and gurls) - you guys are FRIKIN funny, its THE funniest class ive been in for my life! you guys really made me feel at home, as you know i'm so silent and can't really talk to people. But also for the work, whatever stuff i ask you guys are here to help me. Thanks pals :)
Ben Soh - Thanks for teaching me so much about iron and gyming man! look forward to gym more often! although i will haf to decrease in sessions. all the best in ARmy man!
Shane - the bus rides to school n the conversations. Thank God you were there to prevent me from sleeping n missing my stops! All the best in police man!
FireAC- this one really cannot not thank. morning sessions really kept me with God, in touch, never our of touch. we are here to fellowship, and gain more for Jesus. You guys never forgot your call, and this is one thing that inspires me do you guys know that? All for God! thank Him!
JunEn, CNE - rubbish fellas! so much fun wif u 2 on squash, playing n screwing round. still remember i hit JE on the butt with the ball HAHAHA. But more than that too. can talk about almost anything man. And the endless switchfoot craze from junen. And thank God for u 2 aren't shallow people. We have things to talk, and u guys won't profess it in a shallow manner. Really get to know more things about the world and life.
Woon - for your PROTEIN HAHA and yea. also for you as a friend, because we 2 are really frikin similar. this year, i just realized tt we are even more similar. Both of us went through the same shit, like quite the same stuff. But hey, God is always there and He is the only way right! Nothing, in Him, is impossible. Thanks for being there to understand and listen to me and to learn bboying too!
Christina - you are one person who really hasn't changed much in the past year man. whether it matters or not, thank God you are a fireac leader and setting an example for all of the rest. thanks for being a testimony and a pillar for fireac. I pray that God be on your side in everything you do.
Zoey & Peiwen - once in a while random messages for support in upcoming competitions. And thanks for coming to support song n i for RPsenting! whatever it is, i really do appreciate those supportive phrases and encouragements, because they DO encourage me.
God - for all the experiences year round. i never learnt and experienced that much. ive become more insightful, slower to viscous judgement. because of You. time and again things pop up along me way to remind me of my walk with You. Thank you for those reminders. Thank you for so much that happened this year. As i wait upon the new year, i will finish this year well with 8 days to go.
with the 2007 coming to a close, i'm glad this year i've fufilled a number of new year's resolutions. though disappointed that some aren't done.
Labels: christian-bboy, friends n loved ones, sincerely
Koinonia
koinonia - somethin ive been lookin forward to. so much, so far.
here are pics taken today. the last 5 are of practices for koinonia.
Mr. James Ong- people say i look like him.... wat do u think???
Practising an hour before Koinonia
A. Goh
Errr.. ok. thats audrey low wif her eyes closed.
Koinonia means so much to me. although i don't feel very comfortable doing so little stuff except takin pictures using emil's phone and praying for them through the whole thing, i feel very fufilled, cos it satisfies the burning desire to do something for God, to be directly involved in his ministry.
This is all i've longed for last yr. difference is, this year i'm involved in his ministry directly, spreading the word to my friends. last year, i have no balls :XKoinonia filled this deep longing and thirst in me. Although this won't ever be enough. Gotta do more for God. Wanna do more for God. it will prevail.
The practice
Is this the first step?
Or another fallen short?
Another evening,
Or will seeds be planted?
Have we made it yours?
Yours to hold?
This land you've lay before us?
Bleak winter, this summer,
A chance lost to stand.
A chance the track,
A chance to show the little i can do for You.
Cutting into my bones,
Through my thick flesh, and skin.
Can you let another chance pay its visit?
'Cause I'm burning to build your house.
Labels: christian-bboy, ilovemebutGodlovesmemore, Literary, sincerely
great hope
hope for a conclusion.
if better, a sweet conclusion..
hope so much, praying so much from now. :)
Labels: sincerely
holds nothing back
nothing!!!! all will be DISAPEARED!!
not celebrating now, but im celebrating the breakin free of this bondage that is holding me back for this time. i am breaking away. facing everything, facing it. and i dont care anything thats gonna come my way to try to change my stand. it is firm. i have put my trust and everything in God. It will come to pass. It will pass in God's will. :D:D:D:D
I don't knoe why, but im smiling now. A mild smile, but flushed with assurance and deep understanding, security.
Everything will come to an end, so will this chapter be shut always, as i continue writing the book of my life, listening to the resounding punishments and knowledge of my past. the pen keeps flowing, yuanhao keeps being a christian :D and these are sum of the ppl i love most in sch.
Thats kyensai, from left to right: xinfu, me, daniel, edmund
I've got a direction man. not holding anything back. man, im merciless and powerful. jkjk. i mean christian and determined :D As my last post declares that im hurting more and more now, ive decided 2 finish everything off completely, for its really for the better. DONT U THINK SO PEOPOLE?
jeah.
Labels: sincerely
Mr. James Ong- people say i look like him.... wat do u think???
Practising an hour before Koinonia
A. Goh
Errr.. ok. thats audrey low wif her eyes closed.
Thats kyensai, from left to right: xinfu, me, daniel, edmund
